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Things I am depressed about

  • Being in school still and still not close to graduating because of classes being full.

  • Not being able to acquire a part time job despite applying everywhere.

  • Seeing friends less and less. Or not at all. Don’t give me just an hour to hang out. Give me more time, dammit. Hell I haven’t been able to visit anyone just because I have to share my car.

  • Not being able to drive wherever anymore. 

  • Not being able to afford a lot of food from the grocery store to cook.

  • Loss of autonomy when it comes to going out places, even for simple things like for a dental appointment.

  • Being alone all the time. Don’t give me your being alone allows you to focus on yourself shit. I was alone most of last year and am tired of myself.  

  • People not texting/calling back whenever I just want to catch up with them or need to ask a simple question. Why own a phone if you can’t even text back: sorry busy atm, text/call at this time OR I’ll call you back at…

  • Not having a bike to use to go out. I don’t mind running but a bike would be nice to traverse more terrain.

  • Not being able to go to the gym as much. I’ve lost weight without the aid of a gym but I do miss resistance training.

  • Feeling like I’ll never grow up, despite being mature and handling not just my own but other’s issues with a sense of understanding, sensitivity and defeatist concern

  • Being stuck at home. I’m stir crazy and punched a hole into something recently. 

  • Physical illness is slowly creeping and becoming obvious.

  • Lack of letters from pen pals.

  • Bereavement. BEREAVEMENT. BEREAVEMENT.

  • Scared that if I ever do become not depressed, that I’ll just be. No emotion, no feeling, a stoic rational and adjustment, I’ll just be there physically but mentally gone.
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